In This Edition
Safety Tips:

• School Safety: Does your child know its okay to tell?
• Personal Safety: Know where the kids play
• Questions from Readers' and Our Answers: How do I handle the big kid who hangs around my little kids?
• Statistics:
• Open for Discussion Ð One Opinion

School and Camp Safety:

You've spent awhile psyching your child up for camp, reassuring her that it will be fun and safe. If your child felt uncomfortable with something a camp counselor did at camp would she feel okay about telling you after that pep rally? Make sure your child understands that although you checked out the camp setting and trust the camp, that you are open to hearing about anything that makes your child feel uncomfortable. Too often children feel that they must tolerate behaviors from older people in authority, without recourse. Teach your child that he is not a tattletale if he reports a counselor's behavior to you or another camp counselor. In fact, their safety may depend upon feeling that empowerment.


Personal Safety:

Preteen children are going to want some freedom this summer. They are going to want to roam the neighborhood, and frankly, even safety conscious parents are going to let them. The question is, how can a parent feel assured their child is safe after that first half hour or two? It's not like the days when you set up their playdates, and it's not quite the time when they are on a "real date." So where are they and what are they doing? IfÊthey are "roaming around" are you sure they understand basic safety issues like which side of the road to bike on and always wear white after dusk? Can they reach you quickly if there is trouble? If they are only starting to go out on their own, instill the habit of checking in with you, via a beeper or cell phone, or calling from a friend's house, and answering when you page them. Technology can be helpful, but it doesn't replace your interest and concern. Children who appear lonely are more frequently targets for abuse. Help your child learn what resources are available in your community for youth; if there aren't enough opportunities, find a place that needs volunteers and get a community project started. Or get the teens to petition your town for a youth center.

Q.There is a twelve year old boy who has been riding his bike into our neighborhood to play. The trouble is, the only kids in our area are all 10 and under. They find him too big and don't like the mean way he talks to them, but they are afraid to tell him to go away. What can we do?

A.This 12 year old sounds like he may not have very mature social skills, and is likely hoping that the little kids in your area may be more accepting than the kids on his own street. However, since you stated that he speaks meanly to them, you do need to protect your own children and hope his parents help him find ways to socialize. You can tell your kids that they can just say they are tired or hungry when he comes around, and head inside for awhile. If he comes to the door too, just ask him to wait outside and shut the door. He will get bored and go away. Tell your children it is important not to hurt his feelings, but to consistently just go away. If they start to call him names, it may provoke him to stay around and fight, so it is better to bore him until he leaves. Try to be sure the other parents in the area agree to this strategy. Otherwise, you'll end up outside supervising the play time, which is a lot like babysitting for a stranger's child. If necessary, try to meet his parents and let them know he needs to try to find older children to play with.


Statistics:

According to a Prudential Insurance survey of 1,000 teens: "62% of teens felt their communities are good or very good places to live. 71% of teens felt their communities would be better places to live if more adults volunteered. Half of all teens can name no one whom they admire for their commitment to community service." To see this complete report: www.prudential.com/community/spirit/cmszz1001.html

"Between 1989 and 1995, the percent of students who reported a street gang presence in their schools nearly doubled, increasing from 15.3% to 28.4%." (Chandler, et al, 1998).Stats from National Crime Victims


One Opinion Ð Open To Discussion

At times it seems that Town Planning Boards get caught up in the business of selecting the best truck routes, or the right traffic signals and they forget that there are people living in a community. In particular, youth programming frequently is neglected when community planning is happening. This leads to "problem teens" that otherwise could be active citizens. Think about it, if you were 15, what you be doing tonight in your town? Would you get in trouble for that?

So often we hear about the drugs and violence invading our communities across our nation, but how often do we hear about the efforts to improve the quality of life in our communities? There is an innovative program spreading across the country that encourages teens ages 14+ to get involved in "youth mapping" Ð helping identify where teens are, what there is for them to do, and what else the community needs to do for youth. It is a progressive way of addressing the needs of our youth, that includes them in the process. TheAEDCenterfor Youth Development and Policy Research can give you details, contact cyc@ade.org.

You can also explore more research and discover examples of youth in decision making roles by visiting: www.fourhcouncil.edu/cyd. You will also learn how you can get involved too.ÊOur youth need us to include them in our planning, and we need to include them in our communities to help prevent them from falling into anti-social or self-destructive activities.

...Are YOU from volunteering for youth?

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