In This Edtion

Safety Tips:

• Community Safety: Do YOU have the Amber Plan in your area?
• School Safety: Getting home safely
• Questions & Answers: Childcare at resorts
• Statistics:Runaways
• One Opinion: Open to Discussion

Community Safety:

The Amber Plan is a voluntary partnership between law-enforcement agencies and broadcasters to activate an urgent bulletin in the most serious child abductions, similar to the way you would be alerted to a severe weather warning on the radio and television. This way, the entire community can assist the police in watching out for the missing child.

This program has already had successful results. The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children suggests criteria that should be met before an Alert is activated. It is not difficult to establish an Amber Plan in your area, and you can learn how to get this program started in your community by visiting www.missingkids.com or call 1-800-843-5678.

School Safety:

Your child is old enough to start to walk home alone from school or perhaps the bus stop. You've taught them how to respond to any strangers who may approach them, and to stay to the edge of the road. The bus driver has reviewed how to cross the street properly around the bus. One detail you may not have thought to mention….the route they should walk! In your mind, it may be obvious they ought to walk only down the same street and around the corner. In their minds, that walk is ten minutes of exploration, so why not try going around the block the other way to see what's there?

Speak to your child about which streets they should walk down and which ones they should avoid on their way home from school. Even if you trust that all the streets are safe, it still a good idea to pick one that is the proper route to walk so you can know where to look for them if the need should arise. (We want you, as the adult, to be prepared for the worst case scenario of abduction. There are many other reasons for such a rule to share with a child, such as "what if I had to pick you up quickly to go get mommy from work? Or "what if I had Grandma over and wanted to take you to the store with us so we were looking for you early?") For other basic school travel safety tips: www.missingkids.com

Question from a Reader and Our Answer:

Q: My husband wants to take our family on vacation, and leave the baby in the childcare the resort provides. I am scared to do this. I have no idea who they hire there and I am afraid that I will not have any fun on the beach worrying about the baby. Do you have any ideas about how I can save this vacation?

A: You could bring along a teen you trust. If that isn't an option, then before you go, call the resort and ask to speak to a manager -and be sure to find out if the manager has a long-term history there. Ask the manager how they select the babysitters and to describe the setting. Many resorts offer childcare only in group settings, with local teens or retirees providing the care in a playroom. You need to ask how many children each caregiver would be responsible for at one time. Ask how they know which child belongs to which parent - if it is a signature sign-in and sign-out system, be sure they only let the parent who signed in the child sign-out the child. Ask if they have any first aid training, and if not, then who are they supposed to turn to in an emergency.

Now, if you are planning to hire a private babysitter to come to your room through the resort, you will want to know the same kind of information, as well as more specific information. Has the resort screened the caregivers whom they recommend? If so, how? Do they keep any letters of recommendation on file from satisfied parents? Ask every question you need until you feel satisfied that this is a person you would let babysit in your own home. 

Lastly, remember, if you don't feel comfortable with the person that shows up at the door, for any reason at all, just say no thanks. Then, call the manager again, and let him know that you didn't feel comfortable with that caregiver, and could they try to find you someone else. Do not "feel funny" about doing this, it is your right as a parent, and your responsibility to do what is best for your child. Before you travel, it helps if each spouse agrees that no matter how disappointing it may be, no "date" is worth the risk of leaving your child with someone you don't trust. 

As in any child care situation, it is always a good idea to pop back in unexpectedly to take a peek at the situation, even if it means the baby will cry again when you leave again. At least you will have taken the opportunity to reassure yourself that all is well. Keep in mind, a reputable resort does not want bad publicity and in all likelihood has taken this "benefit" of staying with them seriously when they set up the program - but do your own checking too.

Statistics:

1 in 7 kids between the ages of 10 and 18 will run away.

1.3 million youth are on the streets each day.

Assaults, illness or suicide will take the lives of 5,000 runaway youth each year.

The National Runaway Switchboard handles approximately 120,000 phone calls each year.

75% of runaways are female.

45% return home within 3 days, but 16% return with 1-6 months, and 3% are runaways from more than 6 months.

For more details, or learn more about runaways, visit http://www.nrscrisisline.org/2000stat.asp

One Opinion, Open to Discussion: back to top

If a young person sits with his or her face glued to the screen for hours a week, is that really okay? If it's a TV screen, we asked, "what are they watching?" -questioning the content of the shows for age appropriate viewing. If it's a computer screen, we are asking if they know how to safely travel on the Internet highways. If it's a computer game we ask, "is it educational" enough to warrant all that time immersed in it. If it's a hand-held game screen, we ask, "do you have to have that thing on all the time?"

When do our children "come up for air?" These days, it is a safe question to wonder when and how are children learning social skills. Certainly, they can't really be taught these skills in a few simple lessons in a classroom. They need to interact with other people, preferably of all ages. As Americans are re-evaluating how much family and friends mean to our lives, it is interesting to ponder how we include our children and teens in our social gatherings. Do we make time to play board games or charades with them or do we always pop in a video and let them sit while we chat with the adults? Do we talk to them in the waiting room or in the car, or do we take those few moments for our own personal thoughts we've been too busy to think and let them play their hand-held game? It used to be families came together for weekend dinners frequently, with uncles and aunts and cousins socializing or arguing - how do we give them those experiences now a days, those kinds of experiences that teach us how to debate, interact, and find personal peace when among a group?

Ask a family you like over for dinner - nothing fancy. Tell them it's a small party. Play charades. Share stories from your own childhoods, how the world was "way back then." These things give security to our youth, more than the mind-numbing entertainments we too often have filled up their moments with. Yeah, they may complain at first about these "old fashion" parties…but they will learn from them. They do grow up faster than we think, and we've got to take the time while they are still with us to show them how to be together, and let love grow.

If you still haven't fulfilled a New Year's Resolution, why not commit to spending time, regularly, being in a social, non-competitive group with your child(ren)? With some practice being together now, think of how friendly those family holiday dinners can be in ten or twenty years!

This newsletter was created by Laura A. Davis for: 

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